Monday, November 2, 2009

I had a really great string of classes this week.

On Wednesday night, the teacher taught us a really neat sequence that involves transitioning from crow to a tripod headstand then back to crow and into plank. It was really challenging, and I'm still working on it, but I loved it.

Thursday night two of my friends came with me to class, and I got to introduce them to one of my all-time favourite teachers. They seemed to like the class and said that they would try to come every week. I'm always so interested when non-yoga people enter the yoga world, and seeing what a difference starting a practice makes in their life.

Yesterday I had a teacher that I've seen quite frequently in the last few months (she subs regularly at our studio, and would always come into the store afterwards to chat with me), but that I haven't had as a teacher in over a year. She made a comment during class that my practice was looking really strong, which left me feeling all glowy and happy.

Then on the way home, I started to think about what she'd said. Why did this comment make me so happy? What does it matter how good (or bad) my practice is looking. Do I practice in order to achieve something? What am I trying to achieve?

It's hard to figure out, because I tend to be fairly goal-oriented, and the only tangible "goal" that I can see coming out of my practice would be doing my teacher training. Fair enough, that is something that I'm interested in. But it's not the reason that I practice.

Is my goal to stay fit? That's another possibility. I'm not very active, I don't go to the gym, and now I sit at a desk all day. I certainly do like the feeling of strength and endurance that yoga has given me.

Does anybody else ever question their reasons for practicing? Or are you able to let go of all that and just DO?

3 comments:

Eco Yogini said...

ouuu crow to tripod to crow to plank and it's within your grasp???? COOL! definitely in the far far off future for me :)

Yep- hear ya on the praise part. I think about this every so often...

I practice because it helps me ground and connect... and stay healthy since it's my only physical activity. but when a teacher has something nice to say it feels fantastic!

I think it's totally fine to be happy with praise, but it's also important to ask the questions that you are asking :)

(ps- I heard Ontario has been nuts! I feel so bad for all the stressed out parents... :S the same recommendation has happened here- only high risk)

Tina said...

Question why I practice?

ALL THE TIME.

Not in the, god-I-hate-this-save-me-from-myself sort of questioning because I *LOVE* my practice but I constantly keep myself in check with my contemplation re: the practice.

I do practice for physical reasons--there is a motherlode of emotional knots in my body created over the span of my 35 years here and I owe it to myself to tap into, untangle it and fill the space with new stuff.

I practice for the synchronicity between breath and movement and mind that can center me like nothing else in this world.

I practice because I have never felt stronger (BECAUSE of my practice), physically and mentally, and every time I explore a possibility on the mat, it seeps into my life in unexpected but beautiful ways.

I practice because I spent most of my life at war with my body and this practice heals me.

I practice because, when I make space for me to breathe and stretch and strengthen and flow and meditate and unfold into the wee-early hours of every morning, I have space from which to give.

And the praise part?

Nothing wrong with a little soul food--she saw your light and your grace, you accepted her acknowledgement and, like EcoYogini said, you checked the ego with self-evaluation.

Love.

Annabellie said...

Eco Yogini: I don't know if I would say that it's in my grasp, but I could kind of do it... maybe? That transition from crow to tripod is SCARY though.

Tina: Thanks for the feedback - it was really helpful. Sometimes I think that I should just practice because practicing is a good thing in and of itself, and it's almost like enjoying it too much (or, rather, taking pride in my practice) is bad. I'm glad I'm not the only one questioning, and that you guys have some really great answers!